Friday, July 24, 2015

the courage to return

We've been in the states for over a week now. 
Everyone told me it would be easier. 
They told me a switch would click once I landed stateside, and I would be able to continue on normally - just like before.

I've found the opposite, actually. 

It's been difficult.

Things aren't like they were before.

I had a feeling it would be this way...there are some seasons you know you'll just miss forever - they take hold of your heart in a way nothing has before and you can almost feel the pain of their absence before they've past. 
That's the way this was...I anticipated the transition. 
But what I didn't anticipate was the amount of courage that would be required. 

I don't necessarily mean the courage to survive - I'm surviving just fine. 

I'm talking about the courage to thrive. 

There's a difference, you know. 

I'm talking about perspective. 

I'm talking about the courage required to stand in a seemingly bleak situation and to see the good....the courage to choose joy. 

The kind of courage I'm talking about appreciates the past, but takes every moment as it is - savoring the seconds given. 

It's the courage to take a day as it comes and not settle in discontent - to be grateful. 

That's the kind of stuff this move has required - not to dwell in the sadness, or to balk at bumps in the road, but to rise above it and to continue to see the cup half-full. 

Because it has been hard. 
Transition is difficult. 
I miss my friends in Japan and my Obaachans...I miss my lifeguard fathers and 7-Eleven. 
Today, I thought about eating sushi more than I'd like to admit, and wanted to jump on a train to Miyajima.
The future is uncertain here and it has a tendency to loom, at times. 

But that's when things are made most vibrant - because when circumstance would deem a situation bleak, the courage to be grateful colors it beautifully.
 Faith infuses it with joy. 

This is the kind of courage I'm talking about. 

Not a physical courage as much as one of the Spirit. 

It's not easy - it's sanctification. 
But man, it's beautiful. 
And He who calls us is ever faithful . 

 I hope you're finding courage too, this week, my friends. 
 I'll update more soon! 


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